Canceled

Before every IVF cycle, the nurse typically gives you a calendar telling you what to do when. When to start and stop your birth control pills, when to start Lupron and how much, when to start stims and how much, appointment times for the baseline ultrasound and rough estimates for follow up appointments and expected retrieval date. During my cycle, its my bible, at least until I start Lupron.

Somehow I forgot that change and flexibility are key elements of IVF. Just because the schedule says that you will get your period between Monday and Thursday and to schedule a baseline on Friday means that it will happen. It should happen but in my case, it did not, causing even the CCRM nurse to wonder what could be wrong.  Maybe my lining was thick enough from only 12 days on the pill to have a heavy flow? Maybe, just maybe I was pregnant already?

In true CCRM fashion, a different nurse, a different plan. The first one tells me to keep on waiting and just call when I get my period. The second orders me to immediately take a pregnancy test and if that’s negative, go to my baseline. “We have to see whats going on in there.” She said. And in case you were wondering, I am not pregnant so this morning, it was back to UCSF for my baseline and bloodtest.

The good news. My AFC is 12 and my lining is very thin. So thin that the UCSF doc does not think I will get a period. Happens, he says if  you aren’t on the pill long enough. The bad news I learn later. My estrogen is 78 and my progesterone is 18.  Even if my estrogen was close (they like it under 50), my progesterone needs to be around 1. Yikes! So what does this mean? The illustrious Dr. Schoolcraft who was on call this weekend recommending canceling the cycle, that is unless my period miraculously comes before Monday.

Surprisingly, I am relieved. I still take my meds through Monday but I have moved on.  Cycling this month in Colorado meant spending my 40^th birthday jacked up on hormones instead of celebrating with friends. I had opted on missing out on my best friends from college’s visit to San Francisco for the famous Passport wine weekend in Dry Creek valley. It seemed worth it at the time. If we missed this month, we wouldn’t be able to cycle until July with a transfer in September. So now I feel free. Free to indulge in a bite of chocolate, a glass of wine and truly enjoy the last days of my third decade.  I guess that is what my body truly wanted.